Thursday, July 9, 2015

Don't mean to get all bitchy up in here, but.........

I try not to be negative on my blog.  I try to keep the focus, the posts, the highlights all positive.


I found myself venting this week about a few "bloggy" topics.  I want to share and vent here too.  If you want to avoid my mini-tantrums, feel free to stop reading now.

Photo Source

Blogging Pet Peeves:

Not replying to my comments:  Most people are busy.  If you find time to blog; find time to show appreciation to those who enjoy your blog.  If I've taken the time to read your blog and comment, then a reply would be nice.  It doesn't need to happen all the time.  It really doesn't.  But, if I read and comment on your blog more than five times, and I've received no response from you ever...this is what I'll do:
  • I'll check to make sure I'm not a no-reply blogger (I know I'm not); I have no-reply bloggers comment on my stuff, and I feel TERRIBLE if I can't respond to them.  Sometimes, I'll go to their blog and try to find their email, just so I can respond, so they don't think I'm rude or don't appreciate them.
  • I'll check to see if I missed an emailed response in my trash files (or gmails "Social" or "Promotional" files).
  • I'll re-visit your blog to see if I missed something that you responded to directly on your blog.
  • I'll check to see how many comments you received; There are several bloggers who receive 50+ comments, but still find the time to respond to me, but I get it...if you've received 150 comments, you may not have time for little ol' me.
  • If there seems to be no good reason that you haven't replied to me, I'll question if I want to continue reading your blog.  
Okay, so I don't do those things every time.  Obviously.  But, I have done everything listed.  I try to give the blogger the benefit of my doubts that there is a reason that I'm not hearing back from them.

This is especially bad if I read/follow your blog, follow your instagram and/or twitter, if I've liked, commented, or retweeted your tweets/pics.  If I am supporting you like that, I think you've got some great content.  But, if I feel you aren't really appreciating's difficult to keep that support going.

So, like, talk to me, okay?

Participation in link-ups or blog hops, but not showing love to the others that are linking-up:  Everyone has their reasons for participating in a link-up.  Mostly, you're sharing yourself, your thoughts, and/or common interests.  Plus, you're trying to gain some exposure.  Link-ups are great for this.  So, support and show love for the other link-up participants.  Of course, not everyone is going to have the time to do it every time (look at the other linkers), but if you participate regularly in a link-up, then I think it is absolutely rude not to support the others.  By support, I mean: go read what they linked, comment if you are inspired to do so, even take a look at other blog posts or their "about me" if you really, really like what you see.  It's kinda like breaking the golden rule.  Treat others the way you want to be treated.  Well, if you want others to read and interact with your blog, then you should read and interact with theirs.

Amanda at Meet @ the Barre hosts a super popular Friday Favorites link-up.  As I type this, there are 96 links on one of her FF posts.  That's a lot of links. Again, it takes time...and you're not going to have enough time to read every single link for every single link-up that you participate in (that is, if your participate frequently).  I try to tell myself to at least read 5 other links.  Five.  That's not too much to ask is it?  And, if I am having a crazy busy week, well...I forgive myself and just make sure I read 5 next time.

I'm not encouraging you to write a bunch of comments filled with insincere crap.  But if you're picking up somethin' that I'm laying down, then let me know.

(This has nothing to do with this post except it's probably breaking a blogger rule for using it when it doesn't pertain to the post...but I was searching for another usuable gif, saw this, and had to use it immediately.)

And, I thought the whole point in a blog hop is to "hop" around other blogs and find some new blogs to read and interact with.   Well, I participated in my first blog hop, I linked back to the host, I read ALL the posts on the link-up and commented when I was inspired to do so, I even shared more in the blog hop post that I had to (I think), and I was supposed to link a "content" filled post - I linked this post about equality.  I have not received ONE comment from any of the blog hop participants on this post.  #bloghopfail  (The comments I did receive were from people who already read my blog - thanks girls!)

If you participate in a link-up, mention and link back to the host:  I don't think I even need to explain myself on this one, I just think it's the right thing to do.   

Blogger shaming:  I don't follow very many blogger rules.  I'm okay with that because my goals with having a blog are not necessarily the same as others.  They don't have to be.  So, don't shame me if I don't follow all your blogger rules.  (It's happened.  Once.  I got an email "encouraging" me to change some things about how I blog in order to follow that person's blogger rules.)  I admit that I don't have many followers, I don't have much structure or focus, so I don't have to follow the rules.  Damnit.

I blog to maintain another line of communication with friends, family, and loved ones who live far away from me.  I blog to share some of my personal interests with others who have the same interests.  I blog to let myself have an outlet to write, or converse, or let go of a stream of consciousness rolling around in my brain.  Also, I enjoy the almost entirely positive and supportive blogger community.  I have immensely enjoyed the interaction that I've shared with some other bloggers.

You're not going to connect, be inspired, laugh, or be motivated by every post or every blogger.  No way.  But, you may just find something inspiring, or funny, or motivating, or a new blogger connection, that is a positive addition to your life.   That can be a wonderful thing.  I'm all about wonderful things.  And kindness.

Rant over.

Now...tell you agree?  Disagree?  Do you have any blogging pet peeves?


  1. I always subscribe to the comments when I leave a comment, and I reply to comments on my blog - on the post, not via email, because I feel like if I reply privately via email that means the conversation cannot continue on the post. But that is how I do things and I'm not expecting everyone else to be the same. :)

    I followed your links to the blog hop, I linked up as well, and I did not see one single click through to my blog from it as yet. It might turn out that people link up and revisit it later in the week or on the weekend when they have more time.. even me, I actually put the link up aside yesterday to go back and click through to all the posts when I had some spare time later in the day but I never ended up getting back to it. I'm going to try and fit it in today.

    For me, a blog hop is mostly useful to find new blogs for me to read. I rarely find new readers via them. :)

    Anyway I enjoy your blog, and I might find a couple of new blogs from that blog hop, we'll see. :)

  2. Amen. Especially the comment thing! That's why I switched Disqus because I wanted to make sure people see when I respond and keep the conversation going. Why do their need to be blogging rules and 50839 posts on how to be a better blogger.

    PS love the GIFs

  3. People can go fuck themselves because I have my own rules. I do try to be courteous - if I link up, I link back to the host and I comment on the host's blog. I also try to visit and comment on three other blogs who have linked up.

    I hate Disqus comments because I don't like having a conversation out in front of a million people. I also dislike having to go back to a blog to comment again. If I can reply via an email, fine.

    I'm a few days behind on my comments recently. I need to get my shit together.

  4. First time reader here (like on the radio?) and I'm just shaking my head, yes yes and yes to this entire post.
    I respond to 100% of my commenters, which makes me grateful to have a smaller crowd. But I love my peeps, I can't remember any single comment ending with just one response...I'm a chatty person and often end up with full email strings back and forth with some people depending on the post subject. The no-reply commenters, I try my best to track them down and forward the convo to them.
    I've considered jumping into a hop again, it has been several months, but it takes work and work was getting in the way of me doing my part of reading and commenting on others. But I do miss finding new blogs and friends.

  5. I pretty much agree with all of this. As a new blogger, I appreciate when a "bigger" blogger who gets tons of comments on posts, still takes the time to reply to me. I've commented on a couple blogs several times and never heard anything and that is a complete turn off to me. My biggest pet peeve is when someone hosts a link up and they don't comment or thank you for taking part. To me, that's equivalent to hosting a party and ignoring your guests.

  6. I have stopped following several blogs, because I would leave comments and never get a response back, so I was like 'Welp...I'm not needed here.' One of the best parts of blogging is the interacting part and it not being a one way action. Lol what blogger rules did that person think everyone should go by? There are no rules here. You don't like it, you don't read the blog!

  7. I admit that I'm not the best at always responding to comments but if I don't respond, I will at least go to your blog and reciprocate. It's common courtesy. As is linking to the host of a linkup. I can't stand when people don't do that.

    As for the person who gave you suggestions about how you should blog? I hope you gave them the suggestion to kindly go fuck themselves and stop reading your blog if they have a problem with it.

  8. totally agree to all of this. sometimes when i get lazy and my inbox gets crazy, i won't respond to 10 emails from the same person, but i'll at least respond to 5 you know?
    i used to visit EVERY single link on any link up I joined.. which is why i rarely link up to anything anymore because I don't have that kind of time and I wasn't getting anything out of it - like I would comment on all these blogs and get no other visits or responses and I'm like why should this be one sided? That being said, most of the people I follow regularly do the same link ups as me so I guess I do comment on others, I just would have commented anyway lol.
    someone shamed you? tell me who, i'll beat them up ;)

  9. I always try to respond to comments, but sometime the follow up comments is where I get lost. So if I'm one of those people that have ticked you off, I apologize in advance.

    My biggest pet peeve has to be commenting and not even getting a response, not a peep from the person. And you've asked them a question. Some people just aren't worth the bother.

    Hope you have a lovely Friday girl! xox

  10. First time reading here and I like you already!!! I totally agree with you 100% about all of this. Majority of the big bloggers lately don't care to follow or comment back. So when I comment on someones blog a few times and I get nothing in return, I don't return and I unfollow. The whole point in blogging is to interact with people. You can't just have a blog, type up stories and act like your readers are your peasants and they're doing you a favor... it just doesn't work that way. Sorry not sorry! So, I am with ya :)

  11. I'm so bad at responding to comments in a timely manner I feel like it's a week later and I'm responding but I do try to respond every single one of them! But I totally agree if you are going to show any love during a link up and what is the point? Actually stop doing the Meet at the Barre Linkup because it was just getting overwhelming and I couldn't keep up with everyone!

  12. I'm so bad about responding to comments because sometimes i feel like my response is going to be lame or not enough. I've tried to get over that and respond, even if it is lame so I'm not one of those bloggers. I try to comment on the blog I link up with, BUT some have multiple people hosting and I don't always get around to all of them. Dude, I mention people sometimes and then don't even DO the linkup because they aren't live when I'm pasting my link so I forget to go back and link up, oops! Oh well!

  13. Agree with alllll of these things. I can't believe someone tried to tell you to change how you blog! I think they're missing the point of what blogging is. Another thing that annoys me about link-ups is when it's a clearly set topic (not just where you link anything) and I'm going through the links looking at a few and their post is COMPLETELY unrelated and they just wanted to add their link to get views. I'm like, there's some link-up out there that isn't this one where your post would be relevant! Find it!

  14. Blogger you blow. Just eat my perfect comment. Anyways let's try this again. Thank you so much for this post it seriously made my day. Girl I cannot tell you how mad I get when the "big bloggers" who have thousands of followers and 5 comments on their blogs don't even respond back to you. Like helllllllo can't you find the time to email all 5 of us back in between your one of ten manis for the week??? This post was a GEM!!! Thank you!!!

  15. Yes to all of that but also STEP BROTHERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  16. I have SUCKED at responding to comments lately, but I try to make up for it by at least commenting on the blogs of the people who visit me.

    And I totally hear you on the Link Up thing. I have basically stopped participating in almost all link ups because too many people drop their links and run. It's not fair to those of us that are actually trying to take it seriously.

  17. So I went back and checked - in the last 30 days there was one click through from the link up and I think that was you because you left a comment. :)

    Maybe you could try hosting a link up here and see if that works out any better? Not one with a whole bunch of rules and that you have to follow a bunch of people.. all of whom I just unfollowed. :) Just one where people post a link to a post of theirs and other people can click through, something simple. :)

  18. I don't like it when people do not reply to my comments either. I mean, I can understand that people don't always find the time for blogging but when you comment on a regular basis and even ask questions and you never get a response....then it can be really annoying.


I love comments, and I enjoy our interactions. I respond via email, but if you're a "no reply blogger", I can't. Don't think I'm ignoring you!