Thursday, February 11, 2016

Solitude

In the busy lives that we lead with commitments and obligations, work and play, house duties and personal relationships, parenting and mentoring, appointments and schedules............and more..................do you ever just want a piece of solitude?  I do.  I know others do.  After all, there are pins on pinterest about it, so it must be a "thing", right? 
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I'm craving a time-out at the moment.  I'm craving some solitude.  I want to hide.  I don't want television or a phone.  I want quiet.  I am pretty certain my guy needs it too. I want to give him a week or 3 days or whatever he needs to have a break from all work and home obligations. I want a week or 3 days of the same. It has nothing to do with our lack of love or commitment to each other and everything to do with a need for quiet and solitude.  I believe having some solo time for a mental health break and emotional rejuvenation is a good thing.
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Sometimes my life has too.much.noise.   Sometimes, dealing with the general public in a customer service type role, I hate people.  Not all people.  Just rude, idiotic, self-centered, uncooperative people.  I've been getting those kind of customers the last couple of weeks.  I want a break.  I want quiet.  I want solitude

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I don't intend for this post to sound like it is filled with negativity.  I really want it to be encouraging for us to bring self-care in our lives.  I need some self-care.  I need solitude.

What do you do for self-care?
 

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22 comments:

  1. 100% agree! I am an introvert and I need time alone or I get SUPER grumpy. That includes time away from my husband. I just tell him I need to be alone for a bit, and go read a book in bed or have a netflix binge while painting my nails. I've never gone on a days-long holiday to get some alone time, but that does sound tempting...

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  2. reading this i didn't see one ounce of negativity so take that back woman! i think it's SO SO important to take that time and do what you need to to reset and get back to neutral. get it girl!

    xoxo cheshire kat

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  3. By Wednesday or Thursday it becomes really hard to pull myself out of bed... I just want to stay under the covers in my dark bedroom with my two dogs on either side of me. Kyle is already at work at that point and it's just me and the quietness of the morning.
    He's going on a business trip this weekend, so you post is just encouraging me to lock the doors and spend Saturday all alone in my house of solitude :)

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  4. I so get this...
    Sometimes all I want is to just lay on the couch with a book, something warm to drink & just be left alone... & then the phone goes off, the dogs jump on my chest (which I dont mind) & of course, the hubs needs something from upstairs...
    you got me wanting some solitude time now

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  5. I have the luxury of being able to work from home so every once in a while, I'll just turn off everything and take a nap or read in complete silence, ignoring everything that actually needs to get done. I think it's important to spend time with yourself and get away from, like you said, all the noise.

    Spending time alone has nothing to do with your love or lack of love for other people. It's totally okay to love yourself just as much and take care of yourself like you would others. It's a lesson I'm still learning but getting better about.

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  6. oh 100% agree girl. a few weeks ago i mentioned i was looking forward to a night on my own and one of my friends acted all high and mighty that she doesn't like to be away from her husband - they work together, only have one car - like they spend 90% of their day together. KC and I obviously don't work together, but it's not about too much or not enough time together, it's about not enough time alone, does that make sense? like if i'm not with KC all day, i'm with other people, interacting with other people, even if it's online. i need to lay on the couch and stare at the tv without paying attention. i need a bath, a book, a nap, kitty cuddles. i need that solo time, and i don't think it's a bad thing at all.

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  7. I, like Rachel above, am an introvert, so I MUST have "Ericka time" every day. If I do not, then I get easily irritated and I feel like I start to unravel. There are moments when I need a substantial amount of solitude, beyond the time that I allot myself daily. During those times, I have a tendency to listen to a lot of audiobooks (the headphones typically deter people from trying to talk to me). I think it's normal to need solitude from time to time. There's nothing wrong with just needing to take a time out from life and to be quiet and still. Have you ever tried tai chi or meditation?

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  8. I definitely need solitude too, as an introvert. Sometimes it's hard because Michael is sort of a half-introvert, but he figures since we work so much we should spend as much time as possible together. With him working a different schedule and with me adding gym time to my schedule I've gotten more time to myself, which is really good for me!

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  9. I totally get this. I'm the kind of person who NEEDS alone time every.single.day. or I'll lose my mind - literally. I think it's good for everyone every once in a while!

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  10. I feel this so much right now. I'm so glad you wrote this. Lately, every single text message, email, notification of any sort feels like a massive intrusion. I took off sound alerts on everything because I just can't deal with the one silent moment I feel like I finally have being interrupted by something I didn't invite in—even if it's a friend or family member or someone I love hearing from. I wake up to notifications. I get them all day. I come out of yoga class and in from a run to find notifications, questions, people needing yet another piece of me. Yesterday I actually sat in my car and cried before heading in to—of all things—happy hour with my old coworkers, because just the course of driving there had been so full of stumbles and figurative roadblocks. Oh, I would so love to truly just take off for a day—even just one day!—and not talk to or see or be addressed by a single person. Ahh, wouldn't it just be so nice?

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  11. I totally get it and can relate. That's me, right now. I have from now til Sunday night, alone. I need alone time, or I fee like I'll eventually snap. We get on each others nerves and it stems back to him working rotating shifts, two weeks on, two weeks off.
    I secretly sometimes wish I was a crazy, single dog lady and people would just leave me the fk alone. Is that bad? Lolol. I'm also an only child and an introvert and definitely what Ericka said resonated with me. The unraveling...

    Love, darling. xo

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  12. Self care is so important! For me, it depends on my mood. Usually diving in to a book or listening to music is the cure for me. Sometimes it is a run or a hot bath. All of the above work great!

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  13. Everyone needs a break from their significant other to recharge and sometimes I need quiet and solitude too.

    I usually send K to visit Grandma and Tyson somewhere then I just veg with a book and no background noise. It's the background noise in my life that grinds my nerves sometimes.

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  14. I require a good amount of solitude too, moreso as I've gotten older. I just want to be left alone, not because I'm sad or angry, just to recharge. I'm in the customer service business too, and people can be exhausting! Usually my go-to is a little music and reading a book. I hope you get some solitude soon!

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  15. I always need quiet time. It restores me and makes others more bearable. I think even if it is just an hour to soak in the tub is good, with a book of course!

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  16. I hear ya! When Chris travels for work, sometimes I really love just coming home to an empty house where I can just do my own thing and enjoy my me time. I do miss him and love him, but sometimes I just need time to myself!

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  17. I think making time for yourself is incredibly important. It's not selfish or weird or dumb ... It's necessary.

    Eric and I typically give each other "me" time whenever we need it. (It's easy now, though, since we don't have kids or anything.) He'll go in the guest bedroom and either watch sports or a show he likes that I don't or read. I'll hang out in the living room and either work on blog stuff, read, or watch something he doesn't like. Whatever it is, we're doing something that we enjoy.

    I think some people would think that's weird, but we've both always needed our own space. (Maybe that's why a long distance relationship worked well for us in the beginning?) We still spend a lot of time together, but it's never a big deal for him to say, "There's a game on tonight I want to watch" or for me to say, "I really need to catch up on some blog stuff tonight."

    The other thing I do for "me" time is work out. Yes, if I go to a class or the cardio room at the gym there are other people around, but I'm still doing something that's good for ME. I consider yoga in particular to be "me" time because it's all about focusing on yourself and being present in the moment. I love that!

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  18. I am so on the same page. I take a lot of long walks alone! And reading always recharges me too.

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  19. 100% I totally think that solitude is perfectly ok and healthy sometimes. Girl I hope you get a break soon :)

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  20. I love alone time! People seem to think I get tons of it because I'm a SAHM, but I have kids that want to talk to me every single second of the day! Haha! Last year when I was nursing my husband back from knee surgery and driving all of us everywhere for three months I told him I needed to go check into a hotel for a night to just be alone and quiet. He still owes me! Haha! And honestly, getting my alone time is better for my relationships with my husband and kids because when I'm with them I'm there 100% and not slightly wishing I wasn't. ;)

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  21. I hear you. Having started my new job about a month ago, I'm still getting used to the routine and feel like I'm constantly rushing. I need down time. Time to unwind and just be. I'm tired of rushing...

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  22. Even my extrovert self needs solitude sometimes. Usually I get it on days that I work from home. It's me and the dogs all day long. It's delightful.

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