I confess that I am still pissed off

In the "I'm still pissed off that rapist Brock Turner is free" news:

I was thinking about this the other day...I used to be a caseworker at a juvenile prison.  I was thinking about the many, many teens that I had on my caseload that were locked up longer than Brock Turner and the crimes that they committed.  Oh, I definitely had some that deserved to be in jail for a long time.  Most definitely.  Some scary dudes. 

I also had a kid that stole rollerblades from his next door neighbor's garage. 

And, another who was arrested for possession of marijuana, the smallest amount possible that one can be cited for, but he was arrested for this same thing multiple times.  He smoked pot.  That seemingly was all he ever did wrong.  It's illegal to smoke pot in Texas, and yes, there should be consequences for breaking the law.  But, when I compare Brock Turner to this mary  jane enthusiast, and the fact that this 16 year old was sent to a statewide juvenile jail for 9-12 months (minimum), and Brocky boy is out in 3, it just doesn't make sense. 

Even the teens that were locked up for let's say "unlawful use of a motor vehicle" (they stole a car), again, they broke the law and should be punished.  But, the victim of a car theft will not be scarred the rest of one's life to the capacity that Brock Turner's victim will.  I know.  I've had a car stolen.  Those guys served longer sentences than Brock Turner.

In Texas (I'm speaking about Texas because that's where I was a caseworker), if a teen is tried, convicted, and sent to a juvenile justice institution, the minimum stay that he can receive is 9 months.  For a teen convicted of the same crimes that Brock Turner was convicted, he'd be given a "determinate sentence" (the minimum of this served would be one year), and he'd be required to receive sex offender counseling before release.  If he did not complete the required counseling and follow his case plan that included education and socialization skills, then he would not be allowed for parole review.  He would serve years until this required treatment plan was adequately completed as deemed by the "treatment team" consisting of his caseworker, a teacher, a supervisory staff member (guard), and a medical staff member.  He could potentially be transferred to adult prison once he turned the age of 18 or 19 (depending on the case) if he did not complete his treatment plan as required.  He could not get time docked for "good behavior". 

How can an adult, like Brock Turner, not be held as accountable as a teenager committing the same act of violence?

For a minute, when I was thinking about writing this post, I thought "hmmm aren't we tired of hearing about Brock or talking about him?"  But, I realized, that we must continue talking about it.  We mustn't let this become just another story that we accept.  We must let our voices be heard again and again that we think that it is un-fucking-acceptable that a person can sexually assault another person while they are unconscious and can give absolutely no consent.  We must let our voices be heard that when this rapist is caught in the act, stopped, arrested, charged, tried, and convicted that we do not accept his excuses and justifications.  That we do not listen to his daddy about how his son shouldn't be judged based on "20 minutes of action".  It can take less than 20 minutes to shoot and murder someone.  Should that person not be judged for that action either, Mr. Turner?  Ridiculous.

Brilliant

And, we mustn't forget the most important voice of all - the victim's.  I will continue to remind myself of her pain and read her full statement because I don't want to forget what she endured, and I don't want to forget that justice wasn't served for her.



Not your usual fun confessions post, eh?  Well, I'm still linking up with Nadine & Kathy anyway.  Happy Humpday!

Confess Sesh: Expat Edition

I confess that I enjoy the "confessions" posts and link-up, but was getting a little burned out, so when Nadine & Kathy changed this to a monthly link-up, I supported that decision.

I confess that a wintery July is still something weird to me; I've been in Australia for 7 1/2 years, but opposite seasons are still odd.

I confess that I still don't accurately know how to convert Celsius to Fahrenheit.  That's what a smartphone is for.  I told my husband about this post, he tried to explain it to me, and this was my face:

Same goes for anything to do with the metric system.

I confess that I now call that space where I urinate or defecate the "toilet" (instead of the "restroom" or "bathroom").

Same goes for "rubbish" (instead of the American alternative as "trash"). 

I confess that I still don't understand Australian politics...something else the husband tries to educate me on...again, Brit Brit helps me out by showing my face when he tries to explain:

I confess that I still don't like to be called a "Yank".  This term does not accurately refer to all Americans.

I confess that I still think it's funny when people ask if I'm Canadian.  (I promise, I do not sound like I'm from anywhere close to Canada.) 

In all fairness...I confess that before I moved here, I couldn't tell much of a difference between Australian, British, and Kiwi accents.  (There's a big difference.)

I confess that I enjoy Australians' use of curse words...like, they aren't offended by curse words...and they don't think someone is "unladylike" because she curses.  Fuck yeah.

I confess that the bureaucracy of immigration stresses me out to no end.

I confess that I will pay $3 for a can of Dr Pepper because sometimes I really, really want a Dr Pepper.

I confess that I still get "sticker shock" over the cost of some things...like, $18 for a margarita.

I confess that I still love playing tourist and tour guide in this city (and should do it more often.)

I confess that I still believe Sydney, Australia is one of the most amazing cities in the world, I am blessed to call it my second home, and if you ever get an opportunity to visit, you should do it!

(Oh, hey, Chris Hemsworth, he's an Aussie, it's like this widget was made for this post!)

Wednesday link-up with Nadine & Kathy 

Confesh Sesh

Hey there!  Here I am, linking up with some totally random confessions (because my head is regularly filled with totally random thoughts.)

I confess that I say "heighth" instead of "height".  I add a random "h" sound at the end.  My husband pointed this out a few years ago, and in all my 30+ years of speaking, I'd never noticed.  #maybeitsatexasthang

I confess that I love Patrick Swayze as Johnny Castle in Dirty Dancing, but I don't like Jennifer Grey as Baby.  #sorrynotsorry

I confess that I don't like coffee, so sometimes, I get bored by all the coffee pics, Starbucks mentions, memes about coffee, and so on.  #coffeecoffeecoffee #blahblahblah

Amendment:  If your coffee pic consists of showing off a cute mug, the fur baby next to it, what book you're reading, or a pretty view in the distance...then I'm A-Okay with that.  #carryon

I'm aware that not everyone is a book nerd like I am, so they probably get bored with all my book posts.  #toeachtheirown #thatwasntaconfession #ohwell

I confess that I enjoy this meme far more than I should.  #needmorepiñatas

I confess that I've studied enough Spanish in my life that it bothers me that the meme doesn't have an "eñe" in "pinatas".

I confess that I have no interest in Harry Potter.  Not the books.  Not the movies.  #dontbothertryingtochangemymind

I confess that I cry wayyyyy more than I should over a stupid reality singing competition show.  #thevoiceau #everyonehasastory  Like this brave woman who suffers from PTSD after a deployment in Afghanistan.  She sang a beloved song by an Aussie band, and the coach that turned for her is a beloved Aussie songstress.  It is really a lovely moment that you should see.

Photo source

I confess that I think some customers are so freaking self-absorbed that they don't deserve my excellent customer service.  #argumentativecustomersaremyfave

Let me give an example: a woman came in on Tuesday, speaking rather loudly and aggressively about an issue that she had Monday.  She kept saying "remember, I spoke to you yesterday" and "I tried to explain to you yesterday".  Well, it wasn't me that she spoke to (or tried to explain something to)because I don't work on Mondays.  I wasn't here.  The other female that works in our shop is an Eurasian Australian; she was born in Australia to a Chinese mother and a British father.  She has dark hair and dark eyes.  She speaks with an Aussie accent.  I have pinkish hair, blue eyes, and freckles.  I speak with an American accent.  We are easily discernible if this woman had paid any attention to who she was speaking to.  (or is it to whom?  do I care?  no.)  Yet, I tried to help her with her issue, but she said she "didn't have time" to explain to someone else.  Could she speak to someone who was here on Monday.  I was fucking happy to pass her off.

With that happy little vent session, I'll leave you be to have a happy humpday!  What are you confessing?

  Wednesday link-up with Nadine & Kathy and Laura & Lauren

Confessions of a book challenge junkie

I've confessed several times before that I'm a little bit of a book challenge junkie.  I don't think I commit myself to too many.  I think I give myself room to read books that have nothing to do with a challenge.  I like the challenges, and I feel that I tailor them to suit me and my reading habits.

I confess to the following reasons that book challenges work for me:

1. Goodreads.  I love goodreads.  I love looking at books I plan to read and scavenging for even more books.  I look at goodreads lists, recommendations, books that my goodreads "friends" are reading, and more.
2. The lists.  Oh, how I love the lists.  I love matching books to categories presented from book challenges.  I love to match them with books already on my tbr, and sometimes, I enjoy it even more when I have to search for a book to match a particular category.
3. The planning.  To be honest, the planning is part of the list-making, but I enjoy that activity so much, it's getting another mention.  I'm a freak when it comes to the planning.  For instance, I have a challenge coming up in June to read from my book shelf at home.  I've already sub-categorized books into historical fiction, YA, non-fiction, memoirs, contemporary fiction, and thriller and am planning to spread my choices over the sub-categories.  I confessed that I'm a freak.
4. If my preliminary lists/plan changes, so be it.  I don't fret.  I try to stick to my original list, but it doesn't always happen, and I'm flexible.
5. Stretching my horizons.  Stepping out of my comfort zone.  Reading a book (and thoroughly enjoying it) that would most likely have never been on my radar if it wasn't for a book challenge.
6. Interacting with other book lovers and challenge participants.  I have participated in previous challenges that gave little to no interaction.  I didn't last long with most of those.  I find that I enjoy the "book talk" with other challenge participants so much that gives me fuel to keep reading. 
7. If I don't finish the challenge, I don't feel like a failure.  It's really no big deal to me.
8. That being said, I do try to finish most challenges I participate in, and I do feel a sense of accomplishment when I do it.
9. I pick challenges that work for me.  In #3, I said that I enjoyed stepping out of my comfort zone.  Well, if I'm gonna confess the whole truth, this isn't always the case.  I'm not going to sign up for a "classics" book challenge.  I'm not much of a reader or fan of "classics".  I may read one or two a year, so I'm not going to join that challenge because it just doesn't interest me enough.
10. Book challenges are just another way to encourage my reading habits.  They are an encouragement to me...that is something positive...if they felt like "work" or a "chore", then challenges wouldn't suit me.

I confess that I actively participate in the following book challenges:

• Book Challenge by Erin - Duh.  I host it.  It is winding up its fourth installment, and it has grown every challenge.  A new one begins the 1st of July (categories to be announced the 1st of June).
• Aussie Authors Challenge (latest post linked) - This has been a superb way for me to introduce myself to some of Australia's homegrown literary talent.
• Around the World in 80 Books - Through bloggers and link-ups and goodreads, I found out about this challenge.  I'd already enjoyed reading books set in different countries and learning about cultures through those stories.  It was like this challenge was made for me.
• Read My Books Challenge - hosted by Dani & ME (again!) - Coming soon this June!  Join us in a challenge to read from the pile of books (ebooks, audiobooks) that you already own and are waiting to be read.
• Semi-Charmed Kind of Life's book challenges - I've been a regular participant in Megan's challenges.  Her summer list will be posted May 15th.

Do you participate in book challenges?  What do you like/dislike about them?

Wednesday link-up with Nadine & Kathy 

A Real Confession

Yesterday, I had some serious talk for you.  Today, I've got a real confession.  Both topics are important discussions with me spilling some extremely personal details.  I promise that I will return to gifs, books, hashtags, and randomness soon enough.

A few years ago, I explored the possibility that I was an alcoholic.

Why did I do that?  Because I recognized the following:

• I drank to avoid and hide from reality and feelings
• I drank excessively
• I binge drank
• I drank to the point of vomiting regularly
• Black outs were becoming more and more frequent
• I acted and behaved in shameful ways when I drank
• Because of black outs, I wouldn't remember some of those actions
• A few times, drinking interfered with work responsibilities
• I was no longer fun and entertaining when I drank; I was mean and obnoxious
• I put myself in dangerous situations
• I put others in dangerous situations (ex: I drove more often than I care to admit when I had no business driving; this is not something I take lightly; I'm just trying to be honest.)
• I drank excessively alone, not just in social settings
• I was depressed, and I was adding a depressant

The above mentioned behaviour patterns occurred over a 15 year timespan, from the ages of 21 to 36.  Some were a regular part of my drinking habits the entire 15 years; others were just at certain times of my life.  All occurred multiple times, some of them regularly and frequently enough for me to admit that I needed something to change.  I wasn't just having "fun" anymore.  It was a problem.

I went dry for 6(ish) months.  During that time, I was seeing a therapist, I read books, and I went to AA meetings for about 3 months.  Through this personal journey, I learned that I was abusing alcohol like a drug.  Just because it is legal, does not mean the way I was using it was appropriate or acceptable.  I made changes in my life with the way that I viewed the use of alcohol, plus the amount and the frequency I drank.

I drink now from time to time in social settings.  I go dancing with girlfriends, have drinks, and let loose.  Or, I enjoy a few ciders with a BBQ.  Every now and then, I enjoy a drink or two at home to wind down.  But, I skip it a lot more often than I partake.  A couple of Fridays ago, I'd had one of those weeks that I wanted to go home and enjoy some wine.  I bought the wine before heading home.  That bottle is still in its paper bag.  I never even got it out.  Once I got home, I didn't want it.  So, I haven't opened it.  I will at some point, but I won't do it "just because" ... or even worse, because I want to hide and avoid life. 

I like alcohol.  Beer.  Wine.  Tequila.  Whiskey & Bourbon.  We can still be friends, but the kind of friends who catch up once every few months. 

I am not in anyway shape or form judging anyone else's drinking patterns or habits.  I am a strong believer in personal journeys.  And, this is a part of my mine.

Wednesday link-up with Nadine & Kathy 

Batman v. Superman: Confessions & Hashtags

I never really cared much about superhero movies until the stepkid came into my life.  He's 8.  Some kids are into sports, some are into cars, my stepson is into superheroes and villains (and dinosaurs).  So, we purchased tickets online, grabbed the popcorn, found our recliner seats, and were ready for Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice. 

Confessions...these are real thoughts I had while watching the movie:

I had high hopes, as I have learned to enjoy many superhero movies.  #imlookingatyouavengers

I was sadly disappointed.  #maybetheworstmovieiveseenintheatersinadecade

Ben Affleck is an okay Bruce Wayne; Ben Affleck is a painfully awful Batman.  #sorryben

I read after the movie that the director chose to use a computer-generated Batman voice.  Why?  It was ridiculous, borderline comical.  #badchoicemrdirector

Christian Bale is an intense actor; Batman is an intense character; I missed Christian Bale's intensity.  #bigshoestofill

Henry Cavill is pretty...not a whole lot of personality...but he's pretty.  #issupermansupposedtobepretty

Source

***The stepkid informed me that Superman isn't supposed to have a lot of personality; he's not from this planet, so he doesn't really understand human emotions.  That stepkid sure is smart sometimes.

Reclining seats to watch a movie are worth the extra expense.  #payupsuckas

I shouldn't eat popcorn while wearing a V-neck t-shirt.  #findingmissingpopcornkernelstherestofthenight

I was so bored with the movie that I started taking selfies in the bathroom because I liked my new Astros shirt.  #openingdayislessthanamonthaway

I am terribly disappointed in the casting for Aqua Man.  Shouldn't Aqua Man be blonde?  #pardonmyignorance

I almost shouted "what the fuck" out loud when a particular character came on screen.  #hasntcgiadvancedmorethanthis

***Later I learned this creature has a name, thanks again to the stepkid.  It is Doomsday.

I almost shouted "what the fuck" even louder when Wonder Woman showed up.  I was expecting Wonder Woman, instead she looked more like Xena: Warrior Princess.  #givemetheredwhiteblueandgold

Amy Adams and Diane Lane have the best performances of the movie.  Plus, they are real women.  Not overly fancy, made-up, plastic, Hollywood-y types, which I appreciate immensely.  #girlpower

Jesse Eisenberg was mildly entertaining in this film.  I doubted his casting prior to the movie, but I enjoyed his work.  #buthestilldidntsavethemovie

Hope I didn't spoil anything or ruin the fun for anyone.  Have you seen this movie?  What did you think?

Wednesday link-ups with Nadine & Kathy , Laura & Lauren,  Alanna & Sarah

Confessions and Hashtags: the 3rd week of the 3rd month

I confess:  I've missed this link-up the last couple of weeks.  I feel no guilt.  Y'all are going to keep confessing and hashtagging without me, and I'm A-Okay with that.  #badblogger

Kimmi posted this Meditation App Review nearly a month ago.  I downloaded a couple of the apps fully intending to incorporate meditating in my life.  I confess:  Haven't done it.  Haven't even opened the apps.  #tomorrowisanotherday

photo source

My friend, Jenn, asked for guest posts for her blog.  I confess: I was lazy.  I pulled an old blog post of mine.  I posted it over two years ago when I didn't have many readers, but it is still a topic that rings true for me.  Go take a look at my guest post about friends who become strangers. #fromthearchives

I confess:  I'm feeling homesick.  I am much better when I have an actual trip to Texas planned and booked.  Have I already mentioned this?  Oh well.  It's still true.  #expatproblems

Since the dog I left behind in Texas, Jesse James, passed away a couple of weeks ago, I confess that I've been making efforts to spend more time with these gorgeous girls of mine.  #furkidsgiveunconditionallove

I confess:  I don't know what's the difference between sparkling water and soda water.  #isthereadifference

I confess:  I got online and reserved 8 books at the library.  Some are for book challenges; some aren't.  Some are based on recommendations from other bloggers.  I have books at home needing to be read, but the library beckons.  #jugglingbooksishard #gimmeallthebooks

I am trying to write a "50 Before 50" post.  But.  Fuck.  50?!?!  Really?!?!  I confess:  I'm having a difficult time looking at the slippery slope of falling down the 50 hole.  #ishouldbe32 #not42

 

Wednesday link-ups with Nadine & Kathy , Laura & Lauren,  Alanna & Sarah

#Hashtag Confessions: 4th week, 2nd month

I confess:  I really have no intro.  I'm just going to jump into this.  Random jibberish coming atcha.  #embracetherandom

I confess:  I missed last week's Wednesday post because I'm in a funk.  #noapologies

 

I confess:  I still watch American Idol.  There are a few seasons I missed, but I've watched most.  #noapologies #ialreadyusedthathashtag

I confess:  I am way too old to be crushing on this American Idol contestant.  I'm old enough to be his momma.  I'm not the only one, Jennifer Lopez (who is older than I am) likes him too.  #hesofage #ichecked

I confess:  I like guyliner.  #noshame

I confess:  I was challenged to write a Bon Jovi post months ago.  I am taking this post way too seriously.  It is too long with too many songs, but I feel guilty when I cut parts of it, edit it, or remove songs, because I love them so.  #jovigirlforlife

I confess:  I woke my guy while snapchatting about Disney's #ShareYourEars promotion.  #itsforagreatcause

For every photo with the hashtag #shareyourears, Disney will donate to the Make-A-Wish foundation up to $1 million dollars.

I confess:  I've never listened to a podcast.  #ineedtolearn #thearmchairlibrarians

 

 

I confess:  I'm feeling blah, so I ate this for lunch: Nutella Ricotta tart. #emotionaleater #iknowitswrong

That's about it for this Wednesday.  What do you have to confess?

Wednesday link-ups with Laura & Lauren,  Alanna & Sarah, and  Nadine & Kathy: